Keep Holing On
by MerlexAddict2017
Summary: "It's a secret that will help you get through the challenges that lie ahead." Richard Webber spoke these words, but at that moment he had no idea what was to come. He had no idea what they would go through in the next few days. Focuses on the plane crash and what happens at Seattle Grace Mercy West during the time everyone is missing and when they first return.
1. Chapter 1

This is just a quick idea that I came up with. I always wondered what happened on the other side of the plane crash. The side we didn't get to see on tv. How did everyone find out? How did they react? I think it would have been interesting to see, so I've started something that I hope will help fill that void (for anyone who has one). I wasn't planing on focusing on any one character in particular, but I found myself writing from Alex's perspective the most (because I love Alex), so hopefully you guys enjoy!

* * *

 **Day One**

"It's a secret that will help you get through the challenges that lie ahead." Richard Webber spoke these words, but at that moment he had no idea what was to come. He had no idea what they would go through in the next few days. In that moment the future seemed so bright.

Richard, Alex, April and Jackson sat at the table in the restaurant waiting for Meredith and Cristina to arrive. They sat there awkward and uncomfortable and as the seconds turned into minutes and the minutes turned into almost an hour and Meredith and Cristina had still not arrived. None of them really wanted to be there. Alex was thinking about going to Hopkins, April was thinking her life was over because she failed the boards and Jackson still felt uncomfortable with the whole April situation. Richard looked around at the three doctors sat at the table with him, wondering where Meredith and Cristina were and began to feel an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.

The feeling was quickly pushed aside by the sound of pagers going off. The four doctors looked down at their pagers in unison, "911 from Dr. Hunt, we gotta go". While Richard was mildly disappointed that the dinner was cut short and that Meredith and Cristina didn't even show up, the other three were thrilled to get to leave. They hurried back to the hospital, eager to see what kind of surgeries they might get to scrub in on, except when they got there, there were no traumas, no patients, no surgeries. The three of them looked around confused as to why they had been paged 911 when there were no traumas. Richard left to go find Owen to see what was happening, to see why they all had been paged.

When Richard returned minutes later he had a grim look at his face. Jackson and April had gone upstairs to change, but Alex was still in the ER. He was texting Meredith and Cristina, to see where they were, cursing them for not answering. When Alex looked up and seen the look on Dr. Webber's face, he got a feeling in the pit of his stomach. A bad feeling.

"Sir, is everything ok?" It took a second for Richard to make eye contact with Alex.

"Umm, Hunt needs to see you upstairs. He's in the conference room on four." Alex nodded and headed upstairs, but not before looking back at Dr. Webber and seeing him pacing, wiping the sweat from his brow.

When Alex reached the conference room, he looked through the window and seen Owen sat down next to Callie. He walked over to the door and knocked before entering. When he walked in Callie and Owen both looked up at him. He quickly realized that Callie was crying.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Dr. Webber said you wanted to see me, but I can come back." Alex turned around to leave, but Owen stopped him.

"Wait Karev, come in. I need to talk to you." Alex nodded and Owen stood up as he motioned Karev to sit in the chair next to Callie. He shifted his eyes from Callie to Owen for several seconds before realizing that they both held the same grim look that Dr. Webber had had.

"Dr. Hunt, what's going on here?" Owen looked at Callie first before speaking to Alex.

"Karev, when was the last time to spoke to Meredith or Cristina?" Alex thought for a moment before responding.

"It was yesterday before they left for Boise. I was ready to go with them, but Robbins has a huge stick up her ass and…" Owen cut him off before he could finish.

"Karev, please…" Alex looked at Owen and then he looked at Callie sat next to him who still had tears flowing from her eyes.

"I'm sorry, I just…I'm sorry. Callie are you ok?" She just looked at Alex and shook her head. He still didn't understand what was going on.

"Really what's going on here, why do you all look like someone died?" The question startled Owen, and for a second he wasn't sure how to respond.

"Karev, there was an accident. Or maybe not an accident, I don't even know." Alex was getting more confused by the minute, but now he too had an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"The plane, it never made it to Boise…" Alex's eyes widened at Owen's revelation as he heard a small sob escape Callie's lips.

"What do you mean the plane never made it?" He could feel his heart beating in his ears and he was sure that if he stood up he would faint.

"I got a call from the Chief of Surgery at Boise a couple hours ago. She said she had been checking with the airport, but the plane never arrived. I've been in contact with first responders both here in Seattle and in Boise. They were able to track the plane so far, but then they lost contact. They have first responders sent out to try and recover the plane." Alex was in shock. He could barely form the words coming from his mouth.

"What do you mean recover? Like recover their bodies?" His best friends were on that plane, Derek, Lexie and Sloan…Robbins. He looked over at Callie and took her hand in his.

"Karev, we don't know. Search and rescue is working around the clock trying to find them, but they have said that…they said that it is possible no one survived…" Alex could feel his eyes moisten as he watched Owen sit down and place his head in his hands. How could this even be happening? A plane crash? For a few minutes he thought he was dreaming.

A few minutes later both April and Jackson walked in. It was evident April had been crying and Jackson was trying to console her, but Jackson was equally upset, even though he tried to hid it. The five of them sat there quietly, no one saying anything and no one moving with the exception of Owen who would get up periodically to check his phone or make a call. Each time he would walk back in everyone would look up and he would just shake his head, indicating that he had no news. After what seems like an eternity Alex shot up out of his chair with a terrified look on his face. Everyone in the room just looked at him before Owen speaks up.

"Karev, what is it? What's wrong?" He looked around at everyone. They're all staring at him.

"I was supposed to be on that plane. It was supposed to be me." He looks over at Callie, who now has her hand placed over her mouth and then at Owen, Jackson and April who are trying to hide their expressions. While they never did get to eat their dinner, Alex gets up from the table and empties the contents of his stomach in the nearest garbage can. Robbins, his mentor was dead because of him. Callie was a widow and Sofia had lost a mother. It was all his fault. He couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't sit there anymore.

* * *

Alex ran from the conference room. He heard Owen and Jackson calling for him to come back, but his legs kept moving. He didn't know where to go, he couldn't go home, the home that Meredith gave him, filled with her memories. He couldn't work, he wasn't even sure he could remember how to work. All his friends were dead. His best friends. They were gone. He was filled with so much self-pity until he realized he wasn't the one who had lost everything. He couldn't fight the tears anymore. He knew where he had to go. He knew what he had to do.

He took the elevator down to the third floor. He passed walls of brightly colored pictures and drawings. In the distance he could hear laughter from children. Children who had no idea of what was happening in the world. To them the future seemed so bright. When he reached daycare, he looked through the window, his eyes searching for the little girl, who did not know it yet, but had just lost everything. When he walked into daycare, he asked the caretaker where he would find Zola. She motioned towards the nap area. She told Alex that Dr. Bailey had dropped Zola off that morning and that Dr. Sheppard was supposed to pick her up, but when he never showed up she figured he got pulled into a surgery, so she put the little girl to sleep. Alex gave her a sad look but thanked her and headed to find the little girl. He walked in and found her sleeping peacefully. His eyes filled up with tears at the thought of Zola waking up and looking for her mommy. He picked her up and sat down with her in his arms. It was the first time in hours that he felt peaceful. Zola brought him peace. The little girl might have just lost her parents, her aunt, Cristina, Mark and Arizona, but for some strange reason she still had him. He was still here and alive and now it was his job to take care of Zola. To make sure Zola was happy. Zola needed a person and he would be her person.

* * *

I hope you guys liked it! I have the next part started, so hopefully I'll get that up soon. If you think there's any point in continuing or if there is anything you'd like to see in the story please let me know. Leave a review and let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Hey everyone! Sorry for the long delay. Life got the best of me the last few weeks and I just didn't have the time to write. Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. I love reading every single one of them! For anyone who is concerned, Meredith and Derek will not die in this story. It will follow directly what happens in the show. Hopefully you guys enjoy this next part!

* * *

 **Day Two**

It was late when Alex had gone to find Zola. Somehow he had managed to fall asleep sat in the chair with Zola up in daycare. He found himself being woken the next morning by Dr. Bailey.

"Alex, Alex, wake up." When he opened his eyes, they first went to Bailey's hand on his shoulder and then to his arms when he realized Zola was gone.

"Zola, where…where is Zola?" He spoke frantically, which Bailey quickly realized and tried to calm him down.

"Alex, she's fine. Zola is fine. She's in the playroom playing. She is fine." She seen his face relax a little, but his brow was still furrowed.

"Last night, I didn't know what to do. The most important people in my life are dead. I was supposed to be on that plane. I cost a child her mother. Sofia lost her mom because of me. I don't know how I'm going to live with that. I was so consumed in self-pity that I forgot it wasn't just me. I haven't lost everything. I still have people, but Zola, Zola has lost everything. She isn't even two years old and she's already lost everything. How is that fair Dr. Bailey? How is that fair?" Miranda Bailey looked at Alex deep into his eyes. She couldn't understand why this stuff kept happening.

"Alex, listen to me. This isn't fair, none of this is fair, but we don't know that anyone has lost anything. We have to have hope. If I've learned anything in the last five years is that we have to have hope. We will prepare for the worst, but we hope for the best. Always. Never forget that." Alex looked at Bailey, he knew she was right, but he also wasn't sure where they go from here. It could be weeks before they found them. How could they live like this for weeks?

Alex got himself together and he and Miranda walked out into the playroom together. Alex found Zola and picked her up and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Bailey came over holding Tuck by the hand. She bent down to his level and told him to watch out for Zola today. Alex placed Zola back down on the floor and Tuck took her by the hand over to the play area. The two watched the two children playing peacefully before leaving the daycare. They began to walk down the hall before Alex stops abruptly.

"What are we doing? What am I supposed to do?" Bailey stopped and looked at him and took a deep breath.

"We are going to work."

"Work? I can barely focus, I can't work." Alex shot back at her.

"Alex Karev, if everyone else here is working, you have to work too. We are all feeling feelings, but we can't let that affect the hospital. There are a dozen kids upstairs that you can help and while we can't control everything in the world, helping those kids is something you can control." Alex sighed, as much as he wanted to go hide away in a bar somewhere he knew he couldn't do nothing. He would go crazy if he did nothing. He thanked Dr. Bailey for looking out for him and left her to go shower and to get ready for the long day that lay ahead.

* * *

When Alex entered the locker room there was an eerie silence that fell upon him. Just yesterday the room had been filled with so much noise, arguments and laughter. But now, the silence in the room was almost deafening. Alex quickly went to his locker to grab his things for the shower. He tried not to look around at the lockers next to him. Cristina's on one side and Meredith's on the other. Both their dresses that April had picked up for them were hung waiting to be worn. He didn't know how long they would be hung there, how long they would be waiting, but he knew he needed to get out of there and fast.

As he got closer to the shower, he could hear faint cries coming from inside. When he entered the room, his eyes were brought directly to Callie. She sat on the floor of the shower fully clothed in her scrubs. Alex breathed a deep sigh and walked over to her and bent down to her level.

"Callie, you can't do this. Let me help you up." Alex put his hand out for Callie, but she just stared at him blankly.

"Callie, please, I'm sorry. If I had known, I never would have…" His voice trailed off as Callie began to speak.

"You know when Owen first told me, the first thing I did was laugh because I really thought he was messing with me. I mean what are the odds? Like really, a plane crash? It wasn't until I seen the tears forming in his eyes that I realized he wasn't joking. He told me exactly what he had told you, but it wasn't until he told you and I heard him say it again that it really registered with me. A plane crash, my wife and my friends were in an actual plane crash." Alex looked at her sympathetically.

"Callie, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault." Callie took a deep breath and wiped her tears before hastily responding.

"Alex please. This isn't your fault. You didn't know the plane would crash. She was pissed at you, but we can't change that now. Mark, he wasn't pissed at anyone and he still got on the plane and Meredith and Derek and Cristina and Lexie, they were all on the plane. This isn't about you. I'm holding on to every ounce of hope and faith in my body that they're all safe. I'm trying to stay strong. I have to, for Sofia." Alex nodded at Callie and forced a small smile.

Callie finally reached for Alex's hand to help her up. When he helped her to her feet and he knew she was sturdy, he pulled her into a hug that neither one of them realized they needed so bad. Alex gave Callie one last squeeze and loosened his grip.

"We're going to be ok." Callie smiled and left to go change, while Alex headed for the shower.

* * *

As much as no one wanted to work that day, and everyone's mind was somewhere else, everyone stayed at the hospital. Jackson was operating on a patient Tatiana, who had come in a couple days ago with burns on her face. He had been holding off on operating, as he was waiting for Mark to return, but now, Jackson was on his own. He didn't know when or if Mark would be back, so he had to do this. He knew what he was doing, Mark trained him for this, but he still had an uneasy feeling in his stomach. He was sat in the attending's lounge going over his notes for the surgery, when April walked in.

"Jackson, I thought you had surgery?" April questioned when she seen him sat there.

"I do, I'm just going over my notes. I want to make sure everything is perfect for Sloan when…if he comes back." April heard Jackson's voice crack as he spoke. Sloan, in some strange way had become more than just a mentor to Jackson, he had become like a father to him. April knew he would try and hide it, but she knew this was hard on him, and he wasn't only worried about Mark; he was worried about Lexie too. April wasn't sure if he would deny it or not, but only a short time ago, Jackson loved Lexie. April went over and sat next to Jackson and took his hand in hers.

"Jackson, its ok not to be ok. Sometimes I feel like I'm holding on by a thread. Everything I knew is gone. I failed my boards, I got fired. I don't know who I am anymore. I want to ask god why, but…" Her voice trailed off as she looked into Jackson's eyes.

"April, I, I thought we were ok now?" April looked at him and laughed slightly.

"We're fine Jackson. I meant I want to ask god why so many bad things keep happening? Why does he keep taking our friends? I lost my best friend two years ago and now, while Meredith, Cristina and even Lexie aren't really my best friends, they're more like my family and I just don't understand why god would want to take them. Why he would want to take a child's parents. I just don't understand."

"I really wish I knew why bad things are constantly happening. The second everything seems to be coming together, bam, there's a plane crash. Like a fricking plane crash. Like how does that even happen?" Jackson began to raise his voice as he became angry at the situation. April couldn't help it as tears began flowing from her eyes. Jackson calmed himself down and moved closer to April and wrapped his arm around her. She laid her head on Jackson's shoulder and the sobs she had been holding in, somehow escaped her body. Jackson looked over at April and wiped the tears from her cheeks. April smiled and thanked him before her body relaxed and sunk into the grooves of Jackson's body on the chair.

The two sat there together, silent. It was as if they were unsure of what to say. The both wanted to say so much, but they were both at a loss for words. While both their bodies were bottled up with fear and worry, for the first time in days, they were peaceful. The peace was quickly shaken by the sound of their pagers going off. They both hoped it was Dr. Hunt paging with some news, but Jackson was being paged to his surgery on Tatiana and April was being paged to the pit.

* * *

It was hours later when April and Alex found themselves face to face outside the OR's. They looked at each other both worn out and tired, but they could each still see the worry in the other's eyes.

"Did you just operate on Sadie?" April asked Alex to avoid any awkward silence and to keep her brain functioning so she wouldn't fall asleep.

"Yeah, she did great. I think she should be fine."

"That's great." April smiled and Alex nodded. Alex was about to speak again when Jackson walked out of the OR behind them.

"Hey guys, what's going on?"

"Nothing, we just got out of surgery. How did Tatiana's surgery go?"

"It was ok. There was a lot of scarring, but I'm hoping that eventually we can get new tissue to grow to make new skin." April could see the look defeat in Jackson's and placed her hand on his shoulder. The three stood there silent for a minute before Jackson spoke up.

"Has anyone heard anything…from Hunt?" Both April and Alex shook their heads with sadness in their eyes.

"Do you guys want to go home tonight? I mean we can't stay here forever and someone will page us if they have any news." Alex let out a deep sigh and before he had a chance to speak up, April did.

"Maybe we could take Zola home tonight? I'm sure she would like to sleep in her own bed, surrounded by her own things." Alex's eyes got soft and almost teary at the thought of bringing Zola home, but he knew it was a good idea and nodded. April smiled and said she was going to get their stuff, Jackson was going to go let Owen and Richard know they were leaving and Alex headed up to daycare to get Zola.

Alex went upstairs and got Zola from daycare. She was so happy to see Alex. By now all the caretakers in daycare knew what had happened, so they had been doing their best to keep Zola content and happy. Alex thanked them and carried Zola downstairs where he met April holding each of their bags she had gotten from the locker room. Zola giggled and clapped her hands when she seen April's smiling face. No matter how dark things got, Zola always made things better. A few minutes later, Jackson joined the pair.

"I spoke with Dr. Webber. Dr. Hunt left to go home for some rest, but he assured me he would page us if there was any news." Jackson grabbed the bags from April's arms and the three of them headed towards the car.

The car ride home was silent expect for Zola making babbling noises before falling asleep. When they arrived at the house the three sat silently in the car before getting out. Alex got Zola out of her car seat and carried her up to the house. Jackson grabbed the bags from the trunk and April got her keys out to open the door. The three of them walked through the door and stopped. The house held a sad silence and a terrifying darkness. The three looked around at the house that was filled with so many memories and now it was consumed with darkness. The three stood next to each other afraid to move. They finally locked eyes when April spoke up.

"What do we do now?"

* * *

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please leave a review and let me know what you think! :)


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry for the delay on this chapter. Life just got in the way. I wrote this chapter a little differently than the others, so hopefully you guys like it. Thank you to everyone for the reviews and favourites. I love reading them all! I hope you guys enjoy! Happy reading!

* * *

The morning came quickly for April, Jackson and Alex. April and Alex had spent most of the night up with Zola, taking turns rocking her and trying to get her sleep, while Jackson tried to be helpful making Zola's bottle and fetching anything she may need. He was somewhat useless when it came to the baby. Zola didn't seem to like being at home without her mom and dad and her crying for her mama for most of the night was really hard on them. Every time she would cry for Meredith April would leave the room, in fear the baby would see the tears that would stream down her cheeks as Alex would try to sooth her. Oddly enough around 4am, it was Jackson who managed to get Zola to sleep. Alex and April had been emotionally and physically exhausted and they could not get Zola to calm down. Somehow Jackson's soothing voice, speaking to Zola about her mom and dad and her Aunt Lexie was exactly what she needed. She finally relaxed and she fell asleep in Jackson's arms.

When they arrived at the hospital that morning, April, who had Zola in her arms gave her a kiss on the cheek and handed her off to Alex who was going to bring her up to daycare, while she and Jackson went to get ready for the day. When Alex arrived at daycare, he met Callie and Bailey who were there dropping Sofia and Tuck off. He was quick to notice that Sofia was visibly upset and Callie was doing everything in her power to calm her down, but he could tell Callie was drained.

"Sofia, please, you'll have a fun day in daycare and mommy will come see you later." Sofia was clinging to Callie's leg when Bailey walked over and laid her hands on Callie's shoulders.

"Callie, let me take her. I'll make sure she's fine." Callie looked at Bailey with tears forming in her eyes and nodded. Miranda picked Sofia up and soothed her as she walked away from Callie. Alex took Zola and Tuck by the hand and walked them both into the daycare, following Bailey. When he got to Bailey and Sofia, she was sat in a rocking chair rocking her. Alex could instantly tell that Sofia was tried and probably never slept well, which was more than likely the cause of her outburst. Thankfully, they had avoided the situation with Zola and she had gone happily playing with toys. After what seemed like hours, but was really only several minutes, Miranda managed to calm Sofia down and she was now asleep in her arms. She handed her off to the caretaker, went over and gave Tuck a kiss on the forehead and she and Alex left together. When they walked out of the daycare, their eyes were instantly focused on Callie who was stood outside crying. Miranda took a deep breath and looked at Alex.

"It's ok Karev, you go. I got this." Alex smiled slightly and nodded.

"Oh Callie, come here. It's all going to be ok." Miranda held Callie with her petit body.

"It's ok, let it out. Everything is going to be alright." Sobs escaped Callie's body. If Miranda hadn't been holding her she probably would have shook.

"Come on Callie, let's go somewhere where we can sit down." Callie nodded and followed Miranda downstairs to the attending's lounge. Thankfully when they got there it was empty. Callie flopped down onto the sofa in the lounge and Miranda followed, sitting next to her. The two sat in silence for a few minutes before Callie finally spoke up.

"I tried so hard last night to keep it together, for Sofia. When she cried for Mark, I held it together and when she woke up at 2am, after being asleep for 30 minutes and crying for her momma, I held it together, but this morning, when she didn't want me to leave her at daycare and I didn't want to leave her, I lost it. I am defeated."

"It's hard not knowing. Not knowing what to tell your child. Not knowing if their mom or dad will ever come home. But children are resilient, and I know this is so much harder on you, than it is on her." Miranda took Callie's hand in hers and the two sat silently. Miranda knew she could say more, but she also knew nothing would ease Callie's mind until she knew, and really, nothing could ease her mind until she knew.

* * *

That day the ER had been incredibly hectic. An MVC had come in that morning and being down a neurosurgeon, a plastic surgeon, a peds surgeon and three residents was putting a lot of extra work onto everyone else. Along with the added fact that everyone was still upset and on edge. The first MVC brought in a husband and wife with their seven-year-old daughter. Alex checked out the child and aside from a few bumps and bruises, she was fine. The mother had some severe leg fractures and some internal bleeding. Owen and April headed to the OR to try and locate the source of the internal bleeding, while Callie scrubbed in to fix the leg fractures. The father also had some internal bleeding, and Bailey and Richard headed to the OR to work on him.

When April and Owen reached the OR Callie was already inside getting the leg prepped. The two scrubbed in in silence. Once in the OR, Owen let April open up the patient, but they were both quick to realize the damage was much worse than they had realized. They worked tirelessly for seven hours trying to save the woman, Callie had even abandoned the leg repair until she was stable, but despite their best efforts, she did not make it. Owen and April were drained.

"Kepner, scrub out and find Bailey and get an update on the husband. I'll be there in a second." April nodded and left the OR. Once alone Owen was consumed with grief. The events of the last three days had been built up inside of him. He hadn't heard from search and rescue since the previous day and that was weighing on his shoulders and now he had to go tell a child her mother was dead. He wasn't sure how much more he could take.

He got himself together and left to go find April and Bailey. He walked up to the ICU to find April stood outside the patient's room. As he got closer, he seen Bailey and Webber exit the patient's room with defeated looks on their faces. Once he reached the three doctors he could see the tears in April's eyes and the sadness written on Bailey and Webber's faces. Richard was the first to speak up, when Owen reached them.

"We thought we had him. He was stable when he came out of the OR. When we brought him up he started bleeding out of his chest tube. He was gone before we even had a chance to do anything." Owen nodded and ran his hand through his hair.

"Hunt, is there a family we need to speak to?" Owen gathered himself before speaking.

"Yeah, a seven-year-old little girl." Richard dropped his head as he heard a sob escape from April. Miranda was the next to speak up.

"Kepner, you've had a long day. Why don't you go upstairs ad sit down for a little while? The three of us will take care of updating the family." April wiped her eyes and nodded before heading towards the elevator.

Owen, Richard and Miranda walked downstairs to the waiting room to find their patient's family. Miranda was quick to notice the little girl who she had seen in the ER earlier that day. Thankfully, she was sat with an older woman who they later learned was her grandmother. When they told the little girl that both her parents had died, they could tell she tried to be so strong, but loud sobs soon filled the waiting room. Owen was unable to bear the sound anymore. He quickly excused himself and proceeded to find a private on call room. When he reached the on call room, the paced the floor for several minutes before he flopped down on the bed. He held his head in his hands and just let his feelings out. It was only a few seconds before he realized that he was not alone.

"Dr. Hunt? Are you ok?" Owen pulled his head from his hands and seen April stood in front of him.

"Kepner, what are you doing in here?" He spoke somewhat aggressively, which startled April.

"I'm sorry Dr. Hunt. Dr. Bailey told me I should go sit down and relax for a little while and I didn't get very much sleep last night because we were up most of the night with Zola and I thought maybe if I slept a little I would feel better, but honestly I don't think anything will make me feel better." Owen just looked at April.

"Oh Dr. Hunt, I am so sorry. You don't care about my problems. You have much bigger problems then me not getting enough sleep. I'll leave. I'm really sorry." April reached for her things that she had laid on the top bunk, when Owen stopped her.

"Wait April, you don't have to leave. I'm sorry." April looked at him sympathetically. She knew how much stress he was under, and she knew he was just as worried about everyone from the plane crash as she was.

"This is the first time in three days that I've actually allowed myself to feel the depth of what is actually happening and it just became too much. I need to know Kepner. I need to know if my wife is dead. If my friends are dead. I need to know." April nodded at Owen indicating she knew exactly how he felt.

"I haven't really been myself lately. I broke a promise to God and then I failed my boards and now I'm not really sure who I am. When we found out about the plane, the questions I would normally ask God, I found myself unable to ask. I don't know why God would want to take so many people away from their family and friends. Right now I think I need to look past my problems and pray for my friends." Owen looked at April and nodded. She went over and sat next to Owen and took his hands in hers. She spoke a small prayer and when she finished, she could see Owen's eyes glazed over with tears.

"Dr. Hunt, we're going to be ok, right?" Owen looked at April and swallowed hard before he spoke.

"Honestly Kepner, I'm not sure, but I think so." April smiled a small smile and Owen pulled her in a gave her a hug.

"We're gonna be ok. Everything will be ok."

* * *

"I am ok. I am ok." That's what Miranda Bailey had to keep repeating to herself in her mind so she wouldn't go crazy. The last three days had been so emotionally draining for her that she wasn't sure how she had made it through. She had to be strong. For everyone around her she had to be strong, but she wasn't sure how much more strong she had left. She had been pushed to her breaking point more times in her life than she could count. She faced more loss than anyone should ever have to, she had gun pointed to her head, held people as they died, watched small children die, but hearing the news of the plane crash was devastating to her. She raised most those doctors on the plane. They were her babies and her friends. She had already lost two of babies and she wasn't sure if she could survive losing anymore. She walked through the halls of the hospital hoping to find some so joy in the day that had been filled with nothing but sorrow. She tried so hard to stay strong, but one person can only be strong for so long. She walked down the hall towards the attending's lounge holding on to the wall to sturdy herself, while keeping her head down to avoid making eye contact with anyone. When she heard his voice calling out to her, she should have known that he would be the one to save her from her thoughts. He always was.

"Bailey, are you alright?" Richard stood in front of her. She looked up at him and she didn't have to say a word for him to know.

"Come on Bailey, let's go sit down." Miranda nodded and followed him into the attending's lounge. The two sat down next to each other. Miranda took a few deep breaths to try and conceal the sobs that were about to escape her body.

"You know I've survived O'Malley dying. I survived holding Charles Percy as he died. I've survived a gun being pointed to my head and Izzie Stevens leaving. I have survived all of those things and I like to believe I am stronger because of them. All of those things happening are the reason I have been able to be so strong the last three days, but I have run out of strong. Sir, if all six of them are dead, I don't know if I'll survive that." Richard took a deep breath and took Miranda's hand in his.

"Bailey, you raised those kids to be survivors. Even Sheppard and Sloan. The fight they have in them, is because you taught them to be fighters. I don't know what's going to happen, but know that if the worst happens, they didn't go without a fight and that's because of you." Miranda let out a small smile.

"Thank you Sir." Richard nodded and placed his arm around Bailey's shoulder.

"We will get through this Bailey. We must pray and we must have faith."

"I haven't stopped praying since yesterday." Richard nodded.

"Me either." Richard let a soft smile escape, followed by a yawn.

"I'm going to go check in with Hunt, and head home for the night. It's late, you should do the same. Hopefully tomorrow will bring us some news."

"Thank you, Sir. Good night."

* * *

Richard walked up to the conference room and seen Owen sat in the room with his head in his hands, surrounded by piles of paperwork. Richard knew the feeling, but he also couldn't imagine what Owen was feeling right now. He knocked on the door before entering. "Hunt, you doing ok?" Owen nodded, not even as much as looking up at Richard.

"Hunt you should go home. Get some rest. This can all wait until tomorrow."

"None of this can wait. If I leave it, the pile will be even bigger tomorrow. Today's problems are only going to be bigger." Owen spoke harshly to Richard, but Richard was unaffected by his tone. Richard was about to speak when he was stopped by the sound of the phone ringing. Owen looked up at Richard. They both knew this was it.

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I hope you guys like this chapter! Please let me know what you think, I love reviews! :)


	4. Chapter 4

Hi everyone, sorry this chapter took so long. Thank you to everyone for the reviews on the last chapter. I love hearing your thoughts! Hopefully everyone enjoys this chapter :)

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Day Four

Owen just sat there stunned at the ringing of the phone. While it was only seconds that had passed, it seemed as if the phone had been ringing for hours. Owen was finally sucked from his trance by the sound of Richard's voice.

"Hunt…Hunt, are you going to answer that?" Owen looked up at Richard confused at first before he realized what was happening. The look of confusion soon turned to desperation as he picked up the phone.

"Hello…Yes this is Owen Hunt…Ok, how long until you know…Why is this taking so long…I understand…I want a call as soon as you know anything…Yeah, thanks." Owen hung up the phone, but kept his head down, needing a minute before looking at Richard. Richard couldn't stand the silence.

"Hunt, who was that? What did they say?" Owen took a deep breath before responding.

"That was the head of search and rescue in Boise. They are fairly certain they have found the plane, but that's all they know. Their team is working on recovery now."

"So do they know if they're alive?" Owen hung his head and shook it.

"Alright, so obviously it's going to be a while. Now you definitely need to go home and get some rest. Tomorrow is going to be a long day."

"But what about everyone else? I need to tell them."

"Tonight, we don't tell them anything. It's late and if we tell them, they'll only worry more. We will come in early tomorrow and page them to meet us, and then we will tell them." Owen nodded as he knew Richard was right. There was no sense in having everyone worried tonight, when really they still had nothing to tell them. Owen thanked Richard and promised he would go home and get some rest. Richard laid his hand on Owen's shoulder before heading home for some rest himself, although he knew that neither of them would get much rest.

* * *

Before they knew it morning had come. While Owen never did leave the hospital, he did manage to sleep for a couple hours in an on call room. When he woke he paged Bailey, Alex, April, Jackson and Callie to meet him in the conference room when they arrived. When he arrived in the conference room Richard was already there. The two spoke as slowly one by one the others entered the room. Alex was the last to arrive and as soon as he entered the room, he knew something was up.

"What's going on here?"

"Sit down Karev." Owen motioned towards a seat next to April. Alex looked around as he sat down. No one was crying so that was a good sign. Owen walked towards the door and closed it. Callie was next to speak up.

"Owen what's going on? Why are we all here?" Owen took a deep breath.

"I got a call late last night." Everyone in the room gasped as their eyes widened.

"Oh my god! Did you find them? Are they alive?" Callie was yelling frantically.

"I received a call from search and rescue in Boise. They found the plane, but when I spoke with them they didn't have any more information. I'm waiting to hear from them."

"So now were just expected to sit here and wait some more?" Alex had become extremely irritated at the situation.

"Karev, calm down. As soon as they know, we'll know."

"I'm sick of this. How many more nights am I going to have to tell Zola I don't know when her mommy is coming home? I don't even know if she'll ever come home. I can't take this anymore." Alex stormed out of the room. Jackson got up out of his seat and called out to him, but it was no use, he was gone. Everyone else sat in silence for a few minutes.

"So all your services are covered for the day. Everyone is distracted, so no one operates. I've pushed anything that's non-emergent and I have the interns overseeing everything else. We're all distracted, so no one works." There was some protest from everyone, but Owen was having none of it.

"No one works. You can sit here all day if you'd like, you can study or research. You can go home, but no one steps foot in the OR." Everyone stayed silent, a few nods, but no one protested.

"I have some paperwork to take care of, but as soon as I hear anything, I'll let everyone know." As Owen left the room Richard and Bailey thanked him, while the others still remained silent.

The silence was short lived as April was the first to finally speak up.

"What do you think we should do? We can't just sit here all day." The five doctors sat in the room looked around at each other. In reality, none of them knew what to do. Sure, nothing today was different than yesterday, but really everything was different. It had already been hours since Owen heard from search and rescue so it was only a matter of time before they knew. They all wanted to know, but the longer they didn't know whether their friends were dead or alive, they could still hope. Once they knew, everything was reality. They could no longer hope for the outcome they wanted. They were afraid of reality. They all sat there for another little while before Callie got up and said she was going to check on Sofia, Richard and Bailey left to get coffee and Jackson went to lie down, leaving April alone. Once alone, April knew exactly what she had to do, what she wanted to do.

April walked the halls, emotionless through the hospital. She was on a set path and she knew exactly where she was going. When she finally reached the doors, she pushed them open and came face to face with the place she is most comfortable. While with recent events, April wasn't so sure if God was still on her side, but right now she didn't need him to be on her side. She needed him to be there for her friends. She sat in a pew close to the front of the chapel and admired her surroundings. Before she knew it she was on her knees praying for her friends. Her friends that had become family. She prayed for the children who may never see their parents again and finally she prayed for strength. Strength for everyone to get through the difficult days that would lie ahead, no matter what the outcome was. Once she had finished, she sat back in the pew and took some deep breaths. She was so relaxed when she heard the door of the chapel open. When she turned around she came face to face with Callie. April moved into the pew further, inviting Callie to sit next to her. Callie sat down next to April and gave her a soft smile. The two sat silent for a few moments before April spoke up.

"I said a prayer for everyone and I asked God to give us strength to get through whatever happens." Callie smiled softly.

"I'm not even sure if they all believed in God."

"It doesn't matter if they believe. What matters is that you believe. Do you believe?"

"I do believe. I don't understand why he lets so many bad things happen, but I do believe that he is there. I need to believe, because I need him to save Mark and Arizona and Derek and Meredith and Cristina and Lexie." April took Callie's hand into hers and the two sat in silence. They prayed silently, each praying for the same thing. After about an hour the two decided to head back upstairs and sit down. While April and Callie weren't very close, they were both very happy to have had each other to lean on today. While the talk was minimal, just having someone who believed in what they did helped.

* * *

April and Callie entered the conference room they had been in earlier that day and were surprised to see both Alex and Jackson in there. Jackson was the first to speak when he seen the two women enter the room.

"Hey guys, you doing ok?" April and Callie both looked at each other and smiled and nodded. Callie spoke up next.

"Karev, have you calmed down?" Alex looked down at his feet, somewhat ashamed for his behavior earlier. "Yes, I'm fine. I went and checked on a few of my patients and that helped me calm down. Don't tell Hunt…" Alex's voice trailed off as Owen walked through the door of the conference room.

"Don't tell Hunt what Karev?" Alex's eyes shifted downward again.

"Yeah that's what I thought" Owen spoke jokingly. Owen sat down in a chair at the head of the table and laid down all the paperwork he had been holding in his hands. Jackson noticed the pile of papers and suggested they could leave to give him some peace and quiet, but he declined.

"Everyone stays Avery. We all need to be together right now." Jackson nodded in agreeance. Several minutes later Richard and Miranda walked through the doors holding coffee for everyone. Everyone took a coffee and sat silently. Some made small talk, but all were afraid to talk about the thing that everyone wanted to talk about. The longer they sat there the more restless everyone was becoming. Looking around they could each see the fear creep onto everyone's faces. April had he head on Jackson's shoulder, Alex held Callie's hand and every few minutes Richard would lay his hand reassuringly on Miranda's shoulder. While everyone was consumed with their own thoughts they were still all in this together. The room was silent, the smallest sounds appeared so loud which made the ringing of Owen's phone seem much louder than it actually was. The first ring startled everyone, the second ring caused everyone to look up in fear and the third had everyone's eyes directed at Owen. Owen quickly pulled his phone from his pocket. The room was silent, aside from Owen's voice and the sounds of everyone's heart beating in their ears.

"Hello…Yes, this is Owen Hunt…You did…Oh thank god…How long…Ok…Wait…" The last words left everyone in shocked and confused. Tears began to stream down Callie and April's faces. Alex wiped the tear from his eye before anyone noticed and Miranda gasped in horror and hung her head. Owen opened up the door and left the conference room for the remainder of the call. They all kew something was wrong.

"You said five…There was six of them…You're telling me you left someone out there…Then who is it…Oh god…And everyone else...Our team will be arriving in a few hours…Please keep us updated...Thank you." Owen hung up the phone. He had been facing the opposite direction than everyone else and he never feared facing them as much as he did now. He turned around and went towards the closed door of the conference room. When he opened the door he was faced with faces of defeat, as well as hope. All of them had tears in their eyes. Tears waiting to fall as either tears of joy, or tears of sorrow. Everyone was afraid to speak, knowing that once they knew, they couldn't change anything. Richard was the one who spoke up first.

"Hunt, what did they say? Did they find them" Owen took a deep breath and cleared his throat before responding, trying to keep his composure.

"They found them a few hours ago. They were all flowed to Boise Medical Center. I didn't get all the details of the crash, but two of them suffered minor injuries and were walking around at the scene. They should be fine. Three of them are critical, but alive." In unison everyone let out a breath none of them knew they were holding. Everyone starting hugging. Although three of them were critical, critical meant alive and as long as they were alive there was hope. While everyone was finally breathing normally again, Jackson shot up from his chair, a look of horror overcoming his face.

"Wait, wait…" Everyone just looked at Jackson confused.

"You said three of them were critical, and two were stable. That's only five of them…" Everyone looked around in horror realizing that there was supposed to be six of them. Miranda was the next to speak up.

"Hunt? Did they leave someone out there? Is someone missing?" Owen looked Miranda right in the eyes. She knew the look. She was a doctor, she used the look before. Whenever she had to break news to a family. A small sob escaped Miranda's lips, as Richard put his arm around her shoulders to make sure she was steady on her feet. Alex, April, Jackson and Callie just looked at Owen stunned. No one could speak. They all wanted to know, but no one wanted to ask. Knowing this, Richard spoke up.

"Hunt, who is it?" Owen looked around at all their faces. His heart was breaking inside as he mustered up the courage to say the name. Callie looked at Owen, tears flooding her eyes.

"Owen, please." Owen took a deep breath.

"It's Lexie."

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Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this part. Just one more part and this story will be complete. Please leave a review and let me know if there is anything you'd like for me to include int he final part!


	5. Chapter 4: Part 2

I know, I know it's been months and I'm really sorry it has taken me this long to update. Life was so crazy this summer and this got put on the back burner. Hopefully you guys will forgive me! :)

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"Oh my god, Lexie, no." Jackson cried out. He was no longer able to control his emotions. Tears streamed down his face as Owen held on to him and tried to console him. Sure, he had broken up with Lexie, but that didn't mean he still didn't love her.

"What happened to her? Do they have her body?" Owen sat Jackson down in the chair and Miranda went over and took his hand for comfort.

"I don't have details on what happened to her, but they do have her. She is safe now." Tears fell from Alex's eyes as he watched Jackson unravel. He held onto April as she was sobbing uncontrollably. It had only been two years since they had lost friends in the shooting and now they've lost another one to a plane crash. Callie who had been sat there in disbelief got up from her chair and headed towards the door. Owen spoke up as he seen her leaving.

"Callie, where are you going?" "Sofia. I need to see Sofia." Owen nodded as Callie left. The remaining doctors sat there in silence aside from the sobs that could be heard coming from April. It was several minutes before Owen spoke again.

"I have to go, to Boise." Everyone looked at Owen and Miranda and Richard were first to speak up in unison.

'We're coming with you." Owen looked at them and nodded. April, Alex and Jackson all spoke up quickly, wiping the tears from their eyes stating they were coming too. Owen shook his head.

"You guys need to stay here. I cannot lose all my doctors. We will go there and assess and we will bring everyone back." Alex spoke up and continued his argument.

"Hunt, please. I need to see Mer and Cristina and Mer will want to see Zola." Miranda spoke up next.

"I will take Zola. You all go home. We will be back before you know it." Alex rolled his eyes as he was not pleased he didn't get to go. April nodded in agreement, as she had no fight left in her and Jackson sat back down with his head in his hands.

For the next few hours Alex, April and Jackson sat silently in the conference room. They didn't know what to do anymore but wait. Owen had already left with Richard and Bailey to head to Boise, Callie had not been seen since she left earlier to go see Sofia and none of them could think about working. Alex wondered how this could have happened again. How did these things keep happening? Why did these things keep happening? He thought about what they went through out there. Who would come back stable, who wouldn't. Every scenario crossed his mind as he tried to prepare for what was to come. He was strong, but one person only has so much strong in them and he was afraid his was going to run out. Alex got up from his chair and let out a heavy sigh. April looked at him with sad eyes, knowing that this was particularly hard on Alex, even if he would try and deny it. April could tell his thoughts were running wild and composed herself before speaking up.

"Alex, are you ok?" Sure she knew he wasn't ok, but it was the only thing she could think of to ask.

"I'm fine. I'm going to find Callie and check and make sure she's ok." April gave him a soft smile and nodded.

Alex walked the halls of the hospital looking for Callie. He checked the attending lounge, the cafeteria, an on call room, but he had no luck. He thought maybe she was still upstairs with Sofia so she decided to head up that way. When he reached the daycare, he looked into the window searching for Callie. His eyes could not find Callie, however they did fall upon Sofia playing quietly with some toys. He walked inside and asked the caretaker if Callie had been there.

"You just missed her Dr. Karev. She left about five minutes ago, said she had a surgery." Alex thanked the caretaker for the information and headed back downstairs. He was going to give up his search as he knew Callie did not have a surgery scheduled, but thought of one more place where she could be. He took the elevator down to the third floor and then took the stairs up the gallery of OR three. When he reached the top he could see Callie sat in the back row watching the surgery taking place in the OR below. Alex walked over silently and sat in the chair next to Callie. The two stayed silent for several minutes before Callie speaks up.

"You know that OR down there, OR 3, that's the OR that George died in." Alex looked Callie in the eyes and could see the pain in her body.

"I actually watched his brain swell and herniate down in that OR." Alex's heart ached as he recalled that day in his mind. That day was one of the worst days of his life.

"Like George actually died down there." Callie looked at Alex almost as if she was about to laugh at the whole situation, but the grief was just too strong. Alex could see the tears filling up in Callie's eyes.

"Why do such bad things keep happening to us? Alex…what did we do wrong?" Alex shook his head, unable to answer her question. It was only a short time ago he was asking himself the same thing.

"I went up and saw Sofia and I told her that her momma and her daddy would be home soon to see her and her eyes just lit up. She missed them so much. I don't know what I would have done if they didn't make it. When Owen said Lexie was the one who died…I mean, my heart broke, but I was also relieved. Does that make me a bad person?" Alex shook his head no. He knew that if he had been in Callie's situation, he would have felt the same way.

"Hunt, Webber and Bailey left a few hours ago to go to Boise. They're going to assess everyone and bring everyone home. They wouldn't let me go." Alex's voice cracked as he thought of his friends.

"Bailey took Zola because I know Mer would want to see her, but they wouldn't let me go. I need Mer and Cristina. I need them to be ok. I can't do this without them." Callie pulled Alex into a hug.

"We are going to get through this. The five of them are going to come home and we are going to fix whatever needs to be fixed. We can do this Alex. This is when we have to be strong." Alex let go his embrace with Callie and wiped the tears that had fallen from his eyes. He promised himself those were the last tears that would fall. He was going to be strong now.

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I know this is a short chapter, but I wanted to update this story with something. Bare with me, there is more to this story. Hopefully you guys are still interested. I promise the next update will not take so long! Please leave a review and let me know what you think of this chapter! :)


	6. Chapter 5

**Thank you to everyone who left reviews after the last chapter! I love reviews :) I hope you guys are still interested in this story. Slowly but surely it is coming along. I posed another short chapter to hopefully keep everyone interest. Life is crazy busy right now, so I don't have a whole lot of time from writing these days. Although, I did think of a little one-shot that I'm gonna write, so you can look hopefully look forward to that as well :)**

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The minutes felt like hours and the hours felt like days as they waited to hear from Owen, Bailey or Webber. It was the middle of the night when everyone got the page. They had all gone home for the night and as they each received the page, Alex, April and Jackson each got out of bed, although none of them were sleeping and stood at the doors of their rooms and just looked around at each other. They had no details, they just knew this was it. They got ready silently and headed to the hospital. They remained silent during the drive to the hospital. They all wanted to talk, but they were unsure of what to say. When they reached the hospital they all headed upstairs to change into their scrubs. Callie was waiting for them when they arrived.

"Callie, you're here already. Do you know anything?" Jackson spoke up as soon as he seen Callie waiting, eager to find out more information.

"No, I was in an emergency surgery. I just got a call from Bailey. She said they had to sedate everyone, but they're on the medivac to come home. They should arrive in an hour. We will meet them in the ambulance bay." Everyone nodded and took a deep breath they didn't know they needed.

"I'm going to go check on some patients and I will meet you guys in an hour." Everyone nodded as Callie left. They all knew they should do the same, but their minds were racing. This is what they have been waiting five days for. Their friends are finally going to be home and they are going to help them.

* * *

An hour later the four residents met Callie in the ambulance bay. They all remained silent as they became more and more uneasy as they could hear the faint sounds of sirens in the distance become louder. Within minutes four ambulances pulled up in front of the five doctors.

"Alright everyone, this will be the real test, treating the people we love. I want you all to act like doctors and if you are unable to act without feelings, find someone who can." Everyone nodded at Callie's request who was surprisingly calm.

" Alex you take Meredith and Cristina, Kepner you got Sheppard, Jackson you got Mark and I have Arizona." Everyone nodded as they headed to the ambulances.

As the doors of the first ambulance opened, Webber jumped out with Mark laying unconscious on the stretcher. Jackson hurried over and took one look at him and knew it was bad. Richard was giving Jackson details as they hurried into the ER. Alex looked over at Callie as she watched them wheel Mark away.

"Callie they got him. Don't worry." Alex placed his hand on Callie's shoulder as she nodded, trying to hold back the tears that wanted so desperately to fall. The doors of the second ambulance opened and Bailey jumped out pushing a stretcher with Derek on it. April ran to the ambulance and helped Bailey with the stretcher, listening to Bailey as she was giving her the details of what she knew. With her initial observation she knew his hand was badly hurt. They all headed inside and left Alex and Callie with the remaining ambulances. Owen jumped out of the third ambulance followed by Arizona lying motionless on the stretcher. As he helped the paramedics pull the stretcher from the ambulance, a gasp could be heard as Callie ran to Arizona and listened to the details Owen was telling her. She took a deep breath and held back the tears that threatened to fall as they headed into the ER.

In the next moments that came Alex was all alone. He hadn't felt this alone in such a long time. He feared what he was going to face. He knew he could still lose all his friends and he knew he would not survive that. He was broken from his trance from the opening of the ambulance doors.

Two paramedics jumped from the back, each pushing a stretcher, one that held Meredith and the other that held Cristina. While there was no visible injuries, like the others, Alex knew that the things that cannot be seen are often the worst. He wiped the hair from Meredith's face and held on to Cristina's hand as he followed the paramedics into the ER.

Once in the ER Alex could immediately see the commotion. Derek, Mark and Arizona were being treated in trauma rooms, and he could see interns and nurses taking scans and running to get labs. Alex instructed the paramedics to Meredith and Cristina to the fourth adjoining trauma room. Once in there he quickly began to assess them both, looking for any obvious injuries. Cristina looked relatively unharmed. She had no obvious injuries aside from a bruised shoulder that looked like it could have been dislocated. He got his intern to take her up to CT to rule out an internal injuries. With Cristina gone to CT, Alex focused his attention on Meredith. Like Cristina, she looked relatively unharmed. She had a bad cut on her leg and a cut on her head, which he would take care of, but other than that she seemed ok from the outside. He was getting ready to wheel her up to CT when she began to stir. The sedation Bailey had given them was starting to wear off. Alex called Meredith's name as he could see her beginning to wake up.

"Mer, Mer…it's me, Alex. Can you hear me?" Alex could see Meredith's eyes frantically going around the room. He grabbed her hand and cupped her face with his other hand. Alex seemed to calm her down.

"It's ok Mer, you're ok now. Can you talk?" Meredith nodded as tears streamed down her face.

"Where is everyone? Where's Derek and Cristina?"

"Derek is with Kepner, she's checking him out."

"Alex, his hand, he needs his hand."

"Hey, hey, it's ok, everything will be ok."

"And Cristina, where is Cristina?" 'She's in CT, we're actually going to head up there in a minute. You need a scan."

"Alex…" Meredith spoke his name as tears began to flow freely from her eyes again.

"Hey, it's ok. You're going to be fine. I got you."

"Lexie is dead." Alex pulled Meredith into his arms and spoke softly, avoiding the tears that wanted so badly to fall from his own eyes.

"I know."

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 **I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I know it's super short, but please let me know what to you think and if you have any ideas or suggestions, please send them along :)**


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